On the Lam

When things surround me and don't let me breathe, usually I simply ignore it until it's no longer a problem, or if the things are tasks, I do them and move on. If they are bills, I pay them and cross them off a list.

I may be a lot of things, but something I'm not is easily affected by things that don't matter. That's why these past three weeks have been exhausting, surprising, and awful. Not the entire time, but you know how negativity bloats up and fills your days with thoughts concerning it, no matter what other fun things and happy people are around to distract you?

That's probably a given, but I haven't truly felt this way since I was a mopey teenager. I'm new to this. I'm pretty much sold that it's not a valid way to be, and I simply cannot get anything done when I'm not happy.

Since I don't want to directly speak of the subject matter, I will now list all the things that didn't go wrong in the last three weeks:

It wasn't sadness; no one died. My friends didn't desert me. I didn't default on my student loans, entergy has not cut off my power. My sandals didn't break in New Orleans. I didn't throw punches, though I almost wanted to. I've not gone a day without everything I need. No one caught me stealing their internet. My family didn't fall apart, I did not get into a car accident, no one overdosed. I'm not in jail, and none of my friends are either.

Those are the real things that could go wrong, not just in the last few weeks, but every day. What went wrong wasn't real, and on the way home from New Orleans this weekend, the fog around me finally dissipated. That was a terrible three-week vacation, and a real physical vacation to New Orleans fixed it.

I'm back to being impermeable. Score!