I am obviously pleased with myself.

What an exciting year. As I previously stated, I've given up cigarettes, and I'm on day 4 with no nicotine. After last night at work, I thought I had broken down and would buy a pack on the way home, because I wait tables. Everyone who waits tables smokes cigarettes as well. A year on the job and you'll know why.

But I stopped for gas, and just pumped gas. I thought about it, the smell of lighting up, and that I could in fact SMELL it now, and realized I didn't want a cigarette. I wanted something, but it probably wasn't a cigarette.

Still no cigarettes. And now I have this crazy idea in my head that I'm going to cut out booze for a few months to shave off some pounds and save maximum money. What's happening to me?

Believe me or not, I don't care: I'm pointing my finger at the crazy trip on New Year's Eve. Cigarettes were so offensive, and I didn't want to drink for days afterwards. Plus I was broke for about a week and a half after that road trip. All makes sense, right? Thanks buddies, for dragging me to Oklahoma City and making me spend all my money, trip MOUNTAINS, and quit smoking.

Another exciting thing about this year:

"Smoking cigarettes costs you $43.75 per week, $190.10 per month, and $2,281.25 per year."


I'm gonna buy some real cool shit this year that probably won't give me cancer. That's a lot of money, people. I could live for 6 months in a foreign country for that much.

Making real changes in your life is one of the most exhilarating and motivating things you can do when you're in a rut. It's the only thing you can do that will get you anywhere closer to leaving said rut. Don't take this as, "Take a trip: quit smoking", please. Doesn't work that way.

Now for a bike ride. Hello, lung capacity.

50 Minutes

50 Minutes of writing, commence.

Happy new year! In true form, I'm not going to talk about 2009. Fuck that year. Nothing bad really happened, but I didn't improve my situation as I'd hoped.

2010, however, is shaping up quite nicely.

I tripped the new year in with the Flaming Lips in Oklahoma City. It might be the most mind-blowing experience I've had to date. For really real.

I have vowed (and so far, not broken) to eat better and exercise more, in a habitual fashion which I won't have to think about in a few weeks.

I have quit smoking cigarettes. HOW DID THIS HAPPEN I DON'T KNOW! I think it had something to do with abhorring the smell of cigarettes when I was tripping in Oklahoma City. I'm somehow more alerted to how offensive the smell is to people who don't smoke. Advice: Don't take psychoactives if you have a chest cold, unless you want your life to change. I smelled everything separated. For instance, if there was a mixture of body odor, bad breath and booze in the air, I smelled what felt like "beads" of each, one at a time, unmixed. And when I lit a cigarette... ooh. My nose said, "No ma'am."

That first morning after zero cigarettes was absolutely priceless. So refreshing, to sleep without shit in your lungs wanting out.

Tonight will be the real test though: I work for the first time since quit day. Working in a restaurant is nightmarish to an ex-smoker. I feel strong now, and I'll bring my sunflower seeds to work with me, but I'm a little scared. I think I'll be alright.

What's next for this year? Learn, read, build, build. A project every day. Happy 2010.